The secret of success

With how social media are so widespread today, how the internet is easily accessible worldwide, it’s so easy to search for information, and with it, the ease of being targeted by salespeople. Most advertisements about goods and products can be filtered out, but it’s harder to do so when it is about your psychology that is being targeted. I’ve been scrolling through my FB and Instagram feeds, and since I do follow some motivational coach, my ads are displaying people I ‘might like to watch’, and they might give good advice, say something that seems contradict to common sense, or even engage my curiosity through little challenges that supposedly ‘help’ with my personal goal, they might even claim that motivational coaching wouldn’t actually work, but the end message is always the same:

“You will be successful if you buy my product.”


Look at all these statements made by them:

Consulting with Sam Ovens

Rich Dad Poor Dad with Robert Kiyosaki

Charisma on Command with Charlie

It’s always the same, they claim that they can help you live your dream, that the ‘secrets’ they have found will make you a lot of money, and when you see the video or read the free book, they would wind things around, making it looks like they know what they’re doing, but the problem is that they would never come out and say what the ‘secret’ is, that they would tell you personal story while promoting their ‘best selling’ books and urge you to subscribe to their workshops.

When you do pay them to see what they’re talking about, they usually claim that their success is because of XYZ and that by following their example, you will be successful too. The problem with that is that’s not how it works – that’s not how the universe works. There is no such thing as ‘one size fit all’, ever, even the ‘one size fit all’ stockings doesn’t fit everyone, so why would one person’s way of doing things fit/work for everyone?????

No two things are ever the same in the whole universe, even identical twins have differences. You don’t expect a duckling to roost like a chicken, you don’t expect an elephant to grow fur like the polar bear, so why do you expect your life should be the same as another person?

Sure, what they’re claiming sounds good. ‘You don’t need to work hard to achieve success, you only need to do XYZ like I told you to,” pretty much is just a sales pitch, and shouldn’t be taken literally. What they’re expecting you to do, is to buy their book, subscribe to their workshops, and generally give them your money so that they can continue to be ‘successful’. They’re not there for you, they’re there for themselves.

And even if you think you have found a good coach/mentor/teacher, what works for them might not work for you. Actually, if you have the good fortune to meet a coach/mentor/teacher that really care for you, they would have told you this. They would have help you to find your own way, to find what works for YOU.

The secret of success is that only YOU can unlock your success, no one else. Only you can walk the path you need to walk; only you can learn what works for you; only you can live your life the way you want to. No one is as invested in yourself as you do, so please, do not purchase that ‘millionaire’s secret’ thinking it would get you to the same place as the person you’re looking at; please don’t subscribe to those workshops if you think it would be the ‘miracle’ you’re expecting. You can if you want to, but just know that what they’re selling you is part of their ploy, that their success is based on how many people will give them money. It’s not real, and their so-called ‘success’ would crumble when more people realize this truth.

You were born to be you, there is no one else that can be you, no one else has experienced the things you have, no one else sees the world the way you do, so your success can only be found by YOU!

To sum it up, the secret to success, any kind of success, is YOU.

Making mead, first try

From the amount of effort I have put into looking for a certain type of beer, wine, and my tendencies to drink cocktails, I’m probably a closet alcoholic XD However, I’m not really into drinking till I passed out, and my choice of drinks are usually something sweet (like Red Apple Ale, or Mimosa), and only interested in how it tastes (so I really don’t like dry drinks at all, hence I spend a lot of time finding a drink that actually tastes good for me).

So with the taste in mind, I was looking for something that is healthy to drink, and I haven’t found a wine that I like to the point of wanting to drink a glass every day, so I’ve been doing a little research and it lead me to mead. I’ve been interested in mead for a while, but when I was living in Indiana, mead is hard to come by, and those that are for sale usually have high content alcohol, so I’ve passed that up, till now, that is. I did find a couple brand of mead in Carre Four and bought a bottle home to try. While it still does have high content alcohol, the bitter taste was balanced by the sweetness of honey, and I thought it was a pretty good drink. My logic leads me to think that if I can make mead at home, I’ll do less alcohol while getting the benefits of mead still.

Making mead at home turned out to be easier than I thought, and there are two methods: wild fermentation and yeast fermentation. It pretty much broke down into few ingredients: honey, water, and yeast. With the wild fermentation, all you need is honey and water, mix it up, and wait for it to ferment; this method takes a bit longer than the yeast fermentation due to the fewer number of yeast that is available in the honey, so it’s up to you to choose. For my first time making mead, I thought I could just do the wild fermentation and see how it turned out. I’ve read from a few how-tos:

Imbibe Living


Got Mead

Zero-waste Chef

It really seems to be simple: get honey to water ratio, mixes them up, stir a few times a day, rejoice at the result a week or so later. In practice, it didn’t work for me.  I did 1:4 honey to water ratio, and stir as instructed daily, but after a week, I still see no sign of bubbling, only babbling whitish cloud in the mixture.

Upon closer inspection, the cloud kinda looks like a buffed hero in heavy armor, so I just leave it be, blindly hoping that the white cloud is yeast. To give it credit, it does smell a bit of yeasty goodness, but the taste is just simply honey water. After a couple more days, there was still no sign of bubbling, but the cloud broke apart. Some sunk onto the bottom, and some floated to the top. The result isn’t pretty and making me doubt the mixture even more.

Not sure exactly what went wrong, but I’m guessing I would need to get yeast and start over, this time I’ll try another type of honey, and use yeast to make it easier on myself.

While I was reading about honey, there’s also a topic of local, organic honey, and it leads me to think about making my own bee aviary. It would be cool to have my own honey supplies XD I got excited just thinking about the many uses and benefits of honey, and what’s better than having my honey in the backyard?

Well, I don’t have any backyard now, but it would be quite nice once I settle down somewhere XD Though, with the process of getting honey from the hive, there is such thing as Flow Hive, where the process of draining the honey is easier on the owner and the bees, as you can just drain the honey straight from the honeycomb instead of going through the long process of taking out the combs and separating the honey manually. One more thing to put on my list of a dream home, haha. With the number of fruit trees and herbs I want to plant in my future garden, having a next of bees around would make for easier fruiting ^____^

An ideal world

I’ve always been a dreamer, the type to believe that the world should be a better place, a simple world with rights and wrongs clearly defined. I’ve grown enough to see the grey areas, but I’ve never stopped dreaming about an ideal world; it is partly wishful thinking, partly coping mechanism in the world that has a lot of sufferings. Ultimately, I dream of a world where everyone is happy and no one hurts one another, because I do believe that we are all connected.

Growing up in Viet Nam, where gang activities are serious and the public safety is questionable at best; and the States, where it seems those who have money held the real freedom – and in turn, the freedom of the people, I was disappointed with what I see and hear every day, so much so that I withdrew into myself. I’ve lost a lot of my initial enthusiastic to contribute to society, and turn my head away from seeing the world for fear that if I continue to see the suffering, I would either break or be influenced by the corruption I see. Despite the fear, I still have the urge to do something to help, so I pursue International Relations degree; inwardly, I was still fearful and regardless of how I turned it in my mind, trying to look for a silver lining, I still see that I’m heading to a place that is going to be full of pain for me. I’m still too idealistic, too sensitive, and still struggling to understand myself, so I wasn’t sure what I can do. I might have an idea of where I want to go with my life, but I’m stepping blindly forward, and all I can see is me fighting with politicians without the slightest idea on how to win the arguments.

I dislike confrontations, but my fighting spirit didn’t let me give up on the idea, so I’ve been pretty torn. It didn’t help that I’ve been dealing with depression and BPD for the past couple years. I didn’t want to be in a constant battle with other politicians, but I still want to be one more voice that speaks up; so I talk to a good friend of mine, who managed to help me to see it from another perspective. I have been too stubborn and only look at it from only one point of view, haha. In hindsight, I should have talked to my friend sooner, instead of running around inside my head like a hamster.

He helps me to see that there are other ways to fulfill my desire to help by helping me understand that I cannot help others if my strength is depleted, that I should be doing what makes me happy and spread the joy around – it is a more effective method than carrying the gloom and assuming that I need to do everything, be everything, and I am grateful for that.

Now that I understand that in order to add happiness to the world, I have to be happy first. It means I need to step back and look at the big picture, to step back and see both the paper and the black dot, not just the black dot on the paper’s center.

I need to take a step back, take a deep breath and center myself. I still believe in an ideal world, and I’ll keep following the path that leads to it. I’ll still continue my studies, but I’ll keep my views on a global scale and not be so stuck into the problems of the world, and focus on what will make me happy first.

During the talk with my friend, we discussed hopes and dreams, and I found out that whenever I think of creating arts, I get so happy, so driven, and only then did I realize how much art means to me. I mean, I love gushing about games and spend countless hours reading Mangas and sighing dreamily while browsing pictures, but I didn’t actually make the connection (I can be pretty dense sometimes xD), and was surprised at how excited I feel at making arts. I’ll pursue my interest in this, and create joy for myself and spread it around. This should be fun ^____^ I’ll still be in Poland until I get my Bachelor in IR, but I’ll do some research and enroll myself in art school. I can’t wait until I can create fan arts, and hopefully in the future I’ll be working with a game studio cranking out deliciously great looking games. I do wanna be like CD Projekt Red when I grow up 😉

What can I say, I’m still a dreamer 😛 I have regained my spark, and I’ll run with it. An ideal world is possible, and we’ll get there someday.